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Internet
Edition
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How To &
Who's
Who
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Volume
4, Number 1 Page 2
Combined with The VAK,
est.
1982
Fall 2007
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Feedback from
Stanford - NUS Seminar
continued from page 1
- Selling an idea to a VC
- By learning to say no to strangers asking for my help
- Role playing is useful
- Relationship with room-mates
- How to draw attention from others
- Building rapport in negotiation for both parties'benefit
- Understanding others and building rapport
- As a woman, when rapport is
established with a man, I may not want to continue the conversation.
Now, I know that breaking rapport is not only possible, but
recommended in some situations.
- Meeting new people
- Several real world business scenarios.
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Fred Dalili, Ed.D.
CEO, Global Success
Seminar leader
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Unblocking An Impasse Between You and Your Partner
So you want to
go to the mountains on your vacation and the other wants to go to the
ocean with beaches and fishingand lots of sunshine. You hate
sunshine. You blister.
So s/he wants Chinese food on your night out and you want fried chicken.
So s/he wants the thermostat at 75 and you want it at 68.
These things turn up in most relationships sooner or later.
You can fill in your own content. There are strategies for
changing thinking and dissolving the impasse. They 're not in use
everywhere at all times. Try these. You will be surprised.
Question One to ask the other: What specificaly does
(going to the sea, Chinese food, a cool room) do for your? If you
have it your way, tell me how will this make you feel?
Now listen carefully.
Search for alternate ways to satisfy that need for the other,
keeping in mind your needs as well. You might even try
brainstorming separately and then together. Brainstorming can be
fun. It's creative and allows you to peek into the other person's
unconscious. You are searchng for an optimum experience that will
satisfy both of you.
You could go to Big Sur , California which has both mountains
and sea. You could go to the Food Court at the Airport or the
mall which has Chinese food on one side and fried chicken on the other.
The ambience is not great, but it would be different. You
might try the temperature at 70. All are possibilities, if you
give up arguing about the correct decision.
Question Two: Is there anything else you can think of that would give you more pleasure than a two week vacation?
You may be surprised at the answer. Ask the other to wait a day to see what pops up. Then discuss.
Question Three: What if we took separate vacations?
What do you think? What if we went to dinner alone?
What if we bought take-out? What if we turned the
thermostat off and built a fire in the fireplace, in the barbeque pit,
in the yard???
There are at least nine more ways to change your habitual
response. It actually enhances a relationship to explore
alternatives together. The same old, same old, can get. . . . . well,
old.
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COACHES CO-OP
Contemplated for the Influencing with Integrity Website.
Give us your opinion.
We are considering adding a section for Communication Coaches.
- to list their resume
- address
- fees
- set up video conferencing for them
Free for first six months, then small fee for use of the site and video conferencing.
What do you think of this idea?
Genie@influence-integrity.com
 has
an Executive Summary, a Business Plan, an Angel VC, a CFO and a
sparkling future. Want to know how you can be a part of this
future? Call Genie or Mike Hulme, 650-322-2799
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